Meeting Other Writers

It's possible I'm the only writer in the world like this. It's possible that I'm just judgmental, cynical, and socially awkward, and therefore, the only writer in the world who experiences this. But it's also possible I'm not alone, and others among you have the same weird thought processes that I do.

So on Saturday, I went to a Murder Mystery Dinner. The dinner was being hosted by a friend of a friend, and I wasn't an original invitee, since I didn't know these people. But at the last moment, another girl backed out and they needed a girl to replace her. So my friend was like, "I know someone who would love to come!" and thus I got to go to a Murder Mystery Dinner where I knew one couple out of seven people.

Anyway, when I got there I was introduced to one of the other attendees with the following, "Bittersweet, this is Other Writer. Other Writer writes novels. Other Writer, this is Bittersweet. She writes novels, too."

So I shook her hand, but I was thinking, "I wish he hadn't said that." Because I don't like being introduced as a writer or talking to other writers. Because you never know when someone is a real writer or not.

I don't mean a published writer, because that's easy to check. I mean someone who takes writing seriously, who works on it like a craft to be honed but also works on it because not doing so is literally impossible. A lot of people call themselves writers, but I would say only a small portion of them are real writers.

So yes, basically when introduced to other writers, I think "I'm a real writer. Is this person a real writer? Or are they a fake writer?"

I would rather not have that conversation at all, and my first plan of action is to always evade. Change the subject. Do anything else but have them reveal that they got impatient with the publication system to they epublished. (Which isn't to say that there aren't real, good writers going the epublishing route. It's just that, a lot of people e-publish because they don't care to take all the time to hone their craft and are impatient with the fact that writing is a craft, an art, that you must work hard at to become good at).

But I couldn't evade, I was asked point blank what I was working on, so I answered that I was working on the first revision of the book I had just finished. When then caused the girl's husband who was listening to say "oh, you just finished" a little mockingly, as if by saying that I was being high and mighty. In my mind, that was a warning flag that she wasn't a real writer. Which isn't fair. Some writers write one really good novel and that's enough. They spend their entire lives working on it. That's one way to do things. But I would like to make a living as a writer one day, so that's not the way I choose to operate.

The girl I was talking to then said she had been working on the same novel for the past seven years, which then put off another warning flag in my head. Another unfair one, since if you actually count how long I've had the story of Descent in my head, it's been TEN years (though I wrote the first draft just this past year in ten months). And technically, I've been working on Spirit Riddled drafts/revisions on and off for the past six years.

See? I'm being totally unfair. When I meet a writer, I judge them against this measuring stick that even I can't meet. It's ridiculous. Why did this happen? How have I become so judgmental against my own kind?

Turns out this woman is really rather nice. I think I could be friends with her. I don't know where she is in her writing career, but it's unfair of me to judge her so harshly without having read anything she's written.

So yes, I guess the moral of the story is I am judgmental, cynical, and socially awkward. But what I would like to know is if I'm the only writer who has this problem? Am I the only one wary of meeting "my own kind"? The only one who sometimes thinks I'm the only real writer in a world full of phonies? Have any of you dear readers had similar experiences?

The New Schedule!

So I've been thinking about what the schedule should be for a few weeks now. I've had several ideas for different series of posts but was unsure which series could be long term for the schedule. And then a couple of things hit me. So without further ado, here it is:

Monday: Writerly Thoughts

This is the day where I'll discuss topics that relate to my writing, writing in general, and books. This should be a familiar series to anyone who has read this blog for a while. Check out other posts labeled writing or writer to know what I mean.

Wednesday: Women of the Bible

We all know one of my New Year's Resolutions is to have a steady quiet time. I really suck at this sort of thing. I've had this women of the Bible book for a really long time. It's a devotional that focuses on a different woman of the Bible each week. So in order to create an accountability for myself, I will post about the woman of the week every Wednesday, my thoughts about her story like how it relates to my life or things I struggle with or more esoteric aspect of the story.

Fridays: Farscape First Watch
So tor.com has several show re-watches running, where someone watches The X-Files or Star Trek: The Next Generation and analyzes the episodes with knowledge of the entire series and society as it is now. These re-watches are fantastic--I've read the entire Star Trek one--and I would eventually like to do something like that for Stargate: SG-1, my favorite show of all time. However, I am also trying to meet a New Year's resolution of getting in shape (so I can survive the zombie apocalypse). The only time I managed to work out regularly was when I told myself I could only watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer if I worked out while watching it. This was my first watch of Buffy, so the episodes where brand new and surprising--and able to completely distract me from the fact that I'm working out.

Sometimes I like to think I've seen every Science Fiction TV show out there, but the truth is that simply isn't true. Whether its because I didn't get the channel or because I was too young for the content of the show, there are several SF shows I haven't seen, one of which is Farscape. So I've decided that is to be the show I'll watch while I work out.

I know absolutely nothing about Farscape other than the actors who play Valla and Cameron Mitchell from the later seasons of Stargate: SG-1 are the stars of the show. Because I'm coming from such a blank slate on the show, I think there is something to be said to chronicle my initial reactions and thoughts, whether they be first impressions or exclamations at how the plot unfolds.

If I only post Farscape episodes on Friday it will take us a long time to get through the entire series. However, for now it will only be Friday because I have no idea how I'll like the show and I don't want this to become the rant against Farscape blog. As I get into a blogging routine, I hope to one day expand to blogging every day of the week, except Sunday, and then I'll probably post two Farscape episodes a week. But for now, it's once a week.

So that's the new schedule! I hope you guys enjoy it! First Farscape post will be Friday, but otherwise things will start up on Monday!

2011 In Review (aka: Did I meet my New Year’s Goals?)

At the beginning of 2011, I posted about my goals for 2011. It seems every year people make goals, but do we ever complete them? Well, in order to figure it out, I'm looking at each of my goals here to see if I met it or some part of it.

I split up my goals into three categories: Engineer, Writer, and Christian. Let's look at them again, shall we?

Engineer Goals:

1. Graduate in December 2011.
   

   This one is a technical no but a reality yes. That may not make sense, so let me explain. On December 16, 2011, I finished every bit of work I need to do for my Master's Degree. The following Tuesday I received my grades that let me know I would pass and get said Master's Degree. So done right? Sort of. Because I moved to Albuquerque this year, I had to finish that last semester of school via Distance Learning, and Georgia Tech's Distance Learning office has this really weird rule: a Distance Learning student cannot graduate until the semester after she finishes all her course work. So though I finished everything this past Fall semester, I'm not allowed to graduate until next May. It's very strange. So I'm going to say I completed this goal, though on a technicality I didn't.
   

2. Get a job at JPL.
   

   That's a no. I did not get a job at JPL. However, I did get a job, a job I love, and I started it in June 2011. That's why I moved to Albuquerque, NM. So though this is a no, the heart of goal was still met. I got a job, a great job that I love, a job that enables me to work on satellites. What more could a girl ask for?
   

3. Complete my design of R3's ADCS.
   

   This is a pass. I'm done with my thesis. *does a happy dance*
   

Writer Goals:

1. Make the FINAL revision on Spirit Riddled.
   

   This is a fail. I did not even get through a single revision of Spirit Riddled this year. Working a full time job and trying to finish up a Master's Degree is really time consuming, and so is revising a novel. So this goal is going to have to slip to 2012.
   

2. Start querying Spirit Riddled.
   

   Do I really need to say it? Without that final revision, I couldn't query Spirit Riddled, so this is a fail. But next year. Oh, 2012 is going to be a good year.
   

3. Finish a first draft of ANY other book.
   

   Pass with flying colors! I actually didn't think this would happen at all. But this is the very blog where I posted my sudden inspiration about The Descent of Chris Chappell. Though I had a good start on it, I thought that trying to do the dual school and work thing would make this slip to 2012. But it turns out, writing a first draft is the exact sort of de-stresser I needed while writing my thesis. So to my complete shock, I finished the novel in November. Sure, it's only a first draft. It needs revision. But it's done! I met this goal!
   

4. Not be a slacker critiquer.
   

   I'm going to say this is a fail. I only committed to critiquing for one person this year, a friend of mine who writes SF, but once again, my crazy life got in the way. But now that I have free time (I know, mind boggling) I'm foreseeing that this will be a goal I can meet in 2012. Woohoo!
   

Christian/Personal Goals:

1. Be a nicer person.
   

   I have no idea. It's really hard to judge. But two of my friends asked me to be in their weddings, so that means some people like me? Right? And I moved to a new state where my new coworkers all took to me really well, so I seem to be doing ok. And I got in no major fights over Christmas, though that was due to more of a "keep your head down" policy than niceness. But let's just call this a pass, ok?
   

2. Actually have a regular quiet time.
   

   Fail. I suck at this. I'm going to do better though. This is going to continue into 2012. It's going to happen. I am going to develop good habits!!
   

In Summary:

I think we can say I met 5 out of my 10 goals. Sure if this was a class, that would be fail, but it's not a class. It's life. I think 50% is pretty good. But we'll aim for better in 2012. We could say that's a New Year's Goal.

So how about you? Did anyone out there meet any of their New Year's Goals?

Killing your...uh...very much loved things

(I know its Wednesday, which means I should post something Western themed, but since I didn't post on Monday I decided to post on Writing today instead.)

I was going to entitle this "Killing Your Babies", but I thought non writers might not get it. They might think I was actually talking about killing your children. Which I absolutely am not talking about or anyway condoning.

I am, of course, talking about your manuscript.

That first shiny idea for a manuscript is very near and dear to your heart. And your manuscript is in many ways like a child, your baby that you've created that you love more than anything. You don't see its warts and wrongs. You think its perfect and wonderful because its yours.

But sometimes, your kid is a punk. Sometimes your kid is spoiled rotten. And sometimes, your manuscript needs to be completely changed.

So Spirit Riddled, my completed MG novel, has undergone many changes at this point, but its still not the manuscript it needs to be. And last year I got a lot of really good feedback, but some of that feedback involved things that pretty much surmounted to completely changing the story, to killing my baby.

This is something I've been dwelling on for a while. Which feedback is legitimate and will make the story better and which feedback is simply because the critiquer doesn't understand my story like I do? It's a fine line, a very fine line.

So last night I called one of my friends and we talked for two hours, mainly about my story, and which changes we thought were actually necessary to the story. We also talked about my vision for the story (the story arc that will hopefully cross multiple books) and how I can condense that so it can actually be sold. (No one is going to sign me for an a million book series, lol).

I think the solution we settled on is still true to the vision of my story but addresses many of the concerns of the critiquer.

But as I mentioned before its still a fine line. An author has to balance their true vision with something that can actually sell. Where is the balance? At what point are you giving up your artistry to be sale-able?

Any opinions, any thoughts?

Elementary School Sucked

Last week we talked about how I was a weird teenager and a few teenage stereotypes that I really hate. This week I want to talk about another stereotype. This one doesn't just afflict teenage characters, but children of all ages.

Namely its the stereotype of how wonderful/awful different levels of school are. Elementary school is a time of unicorns and butterflies, utter perfection, and everyone getting along. Middle school is a time of confusion and horror. And high school? High school is utter hell.

I contend that this stereotype is grossly inaccurate.

Elementary school was probably the second worst time of my life. (Second, of course, to grad school, which is, was, and forever will be the most miserable, horrible, awful time in my life. It would take an awful lot to top wanting to cry under my desk almost everyday. And I'm not exaggerating. I cried more during grad school than I did as an infant.)

Stereotypes would have us believe that in elementary school, kids are too young to see differences. That they are pure and innocent and all get along without any problem. But in elementary school, I was an outcast. In third grade, no one in my class talked to me--but at least I had friends who had the same recess period as me. Fourth grade? Don't even get me started. I literally did not have a single friend in my school in the fourth grade. In fifth grade, my two best friends hated each other and made my life absolutely miserable.

All through elementary school I was the weird one. I was the girl who liked to read--heck, for a long time I was resented for being the girl who COULD read. I was reading middle grade novels in the third grade when some of my classmates couldn't sound out words. I was the girl who wasn't interested in boys. I'm fairly certain the girls weren't actually interested in boys. They just thought they were supposed to be. But because I didn't, because I saw boys as friends and classmates instead of boyfriends (whatever that means in elementary school), I was weird.

In elementary school I was stuck in a class of thirty other people that didn't change, except maybe (if I was lucky) at recess. (Note: my fourth grade school didn't have recess. Just PE everyday, so you were stuck with your class during that as well).

Then middle school came. We changed classes. Not just rooms, but we changed classmates. You were not guaranteed to have the same thirty people with you. The classes shifted, exposing me to more kids. And something miraculous happened.

I discovered I wasn't alone.

There were other girls like me. Other girls who liked Star Wars. Girls who liked writing and using their imagination. Girls who were still willing to play games of make believe even though we were "too old". Girls who didn't think I was weird. Girls who liked me.

Finally I had friends.

Middle school still wasn't easy, because I do believe that middle school is a time of transition. Things hurts more in middle school, because you're not entirely sure how you should react to them. You're trying to be grown up and a kid at the same time. Its hard. And there were difficult times. But it was SO MUCH BETTER than elementary school. I can't begin to describe how much better it was.

And it only got better. High school? High school was freakin' amazing. Want to talk about finding people like you? Meet the 300 person band. Meet the other thirty kids who think Latin is cool. Meet a school that offers every club for every interest: Aviation Club, Latin Club, Science Olympiad, Quiz Bowl, Honor Societies, and so much more.

And by high school, I knew who I was. I was (am) a nerd. And I had friends who were nerds. And despite popular stereotypical belief, I was respected for my nerdiness. As I've said before, teenagers aren't stupid. They realize the value of intelligence. And they realize that meanness gets you nothing. But if your nice to the nerd. If you genuinely like the nerd. If you get behind the nerd? Well then, maybe on the rare occasion when she thinks an assignment is grossly unfair she'll do the assignment and then send her homework out to the entire class*. Maybe she'll actually let you copy her Latin homework**. But only if your nice. Only if you respect her. Only if you realize that what she's doing for you is a favor. Not that the nerd is mean. She just requires human decency.

And I believe I mentioned before that I was on Prom Court. (Which before that goes to anyone's head, was only second string popularity at my school because if you were on Homecoming Court you weren't allowed to be on Prom Court (and yes, that's me in that picture right there. Not too pretty. Not too thin. Way too much hair on my head)). Being Woodwind Captain of the Marching Band, President of the Latin Club, Captain of the Quiz Bowl Team, Treasurer of the Aviation Club, and President and Founder of the Science National Honor Society may have made me a nerd, but it also meant I was pretty well known. In a school of 3,500 getting the votes of a measly 400 band nerds and general nerds actually goes a long way. And my friend AJ (Brass Captain) made his entire English Class vote for me to spite me. But heck, I got to go to Prom for free so I came to terms with it.

But pretty much everyone on Prom Court was in AP classes and other "nerdy" endeavors.

High school was awesome. I had a ton of friends. I had a ton of activities. I was always busy. I never felt like anyone was out to get me (except possibly my one friend, but she was going through some real emotional trauma, so we forgave her for being crazy). (And before anyone contends I must not have been that much of a nerd, below is an image of me and my friends playing Star Wars Trivial Pursuit. We were huge nerds. And yes that's me with the awful triangle shaped head. I cut off all my hair after that prom photo).

I thought it was just me. I thought I was the only one who suffered through elementary school and found rest and acceptance in high school. But its not true. After talking to several friends, I've found I'm not alone and this stereotype is simply false.

In elementary school you're forced to be with all these other kids. In middle school and high school? You can find your people. And among your people, you find acceptance.

So lets get rid of this tired old stereotype and write characters who have friends. Who don't care about stereotypical popularity. Kids who are odd but liked.

*I actually did this once. My senior English teacher assigned a totally unfair assignment, where she kept changing what was actually required everyday. The assignment was ridiculous and at least ten pages of work and she expected us to do it practically over night. So I sent it out to my entire class (via email). And yes, the teacher did realize what was happened. She pulled me aside in class the day we turned it in and asked, "Mandy, did you help people with this assignment?" To which I responded to the affirmative. She gave me extra credit. Go figure. But I would like to note that no one coerced me into doing this. There was no bullying. Heck, no one even asked. But I saw an injustice. I saw unfairness. And I was sort of a superhero when it came to brains in high school, so I swooped in and saved the day.

**I only did this in AP Latin when we had a crazy teacher who refused to teach us other than saying "Go home and translate that", but never actually teaching us how to properly translate it--the tricks of the trade. It was stupid. So every morning before class, the kids in my AP Latin class would meet in the band hall (there was only four of us) and they would copy the homework from me. Occasionally, when I was busy, I made the others do the work instead. Was this cheating? Possibly. But helping my classmates like this, cheating if you will, was my revenge on the teacher for being awful. She spent our class planning her wedding instead of teaching us and made me teach the Latin III kids we shared a class with on several occasions. Another injustice. Another superhero action on my part. I'm positive the teacher knew it was happening, because on most occasions, if I didn't do the homework that meant no one did the homework. So when she walked in and asked the four of us if we did the homework and I said no she would postpone it to the next day.

Plotting

When it comes to writing, I've always considered myself a "pantser" or a "gardener". For the uninitiated, let me explain.

All writers essentially fall into one of two camps. They are either pantser/ gardeners or plotter/architects. Pantser/Gardeners tend to write by the seat of their pants, or in the secondary metaphor, by having an idea and the nurturing it without being entirely sure what its going to grow up into. Plotter/Architects like to plot everything out before hand and plan everything out.

Though I sometimes make crazy excel charts that relate to my stories, they're rarely plot related. Usually they keep track of characters and their histories. My excel charts might "plot" out the lives of my characters that led them up to the story, but I never actually plan out what the story might be. I generally have a point A and a point B. I know where to start and where I want to end, but what goes on inbetween is up for grabs.

Well, yesterday, that all changed.

For the past week I've been working hard on my story "The Descent of Chris Chappell." You might have noticed that the word count on my Works In Progress page has increased by 10,000 words. I did not "plot" out per say this first 36,000 words; however, I did write it in a different fashion then I normally do. When it comes to chapters, usually I just sit down and write and then break where it feels right. But this time when writing, I know what event I wanted to reach by the end of each chapter. It was strange.

So yesterday, I reached "the event" that I had been working towards with this 36,000 words, the event I decided was a huge change/twist in the plot and would therefore mark the end of the "first part" of the story. I then sent out the story to my critiquers. I don't want to go much further until I have feedback, in case I need to make huge changes.

However, I was feeling restless. I wanted to know what was going to happen next in my story. I knew where I wanted my story to end, but I had no idea how I was going to get the characters from the end of Part 1 to the climax of my story. There were things that needed to happen and the characters needed to change and develop for those things to happen. And I couldn't see it.

But I did have some ideas. So I thought "heck, why don't I write my few ideas down?" So I broke out some index cards and colored markers. I assigned each character a color, even non-main characters, and started writing down my ideas on each notecard. As I wrote my ideas down, more ideas came. But I had to keep track of them all, when my ideas would happen in the plot. So I started laying the notecards out chronologically. But I had too many cards for my desk! So I started taping them to the wall.

And suddenly we got the monstrosity you see in the picture above. My entire novel plotted on notecards.

It's insane. It's crazy! I've never done anything like this. But it feels good. Now when I next sit down to write, I know exactly what I should write.

Granted, these cards don't cover everything that will happen. If I had written out everything that was going to happen, I would have written the novel. But they cover all the big plot points that essentially each chapter should be working towards. And I completely discovered how the climax is going to work. It's crazy how some things clicked together. Crazy how things I "just made up" because they seemed to fit clicked together to make the climax work at the end. I mean that's how a story is supposed to work, but it's still amazing.

I don't know if I'm going to forever change my ways and become a plotter/architect, but for this story, I think it has definitely helped me see the way forward. Who knows! Maybe this is the start of a new era in my writing.

If you're a writer reading this, are you a panters or a plotter? Have you ever tried writing using the other method?

Voice

Today is our first official writing Monday, so I'm going to talk about something that's been plaguing me, as a writer.

I'm working on this new story, The Descent of Chris Chappell. Well, it's a new old story. Remember? It's the one I had the sudden shock of inspiration for? The one I offered up for critique at Miss Snark's First Victim?

In summary of those two posts, there is this story that's been in my head for a long time. Then last March I suddenly changed the main character POV and wrote 10,000 words in one sitting. I submitted part of it for critique and got rave reviews. It was fantastic. But the story hasn't progressed much since then. It's stuck at 20,000 words and has been for a while.

Originally I was writing the story from a female character's POV, and for some reason I really struggled with this. When I switched to the male character's POV, everything was just easier. For some reason, I found Chris's voice, even though he is a crazy, slightly evil character. But Marilla? The girl who is like me in many ways? Her I just can't figure out.

Yes, I switched to a mainly Chris POV, but I need to keep Marilla's perspective as well, simply because a lot of the story happens from her perspective. There are plot points that Chris can't see. And it's a Marilla chapter I'm currently stuck in. I can't get past it.

I plan on taking Brandon Sanderson's sage advice and just plowing through it. I can't remember the post or tweet exactly, but Mr. Sanderson essentially advised to write even when you don't feel like writing. Sure, it might be complete crap, but you can go back and fix that, whether through a revision or a complete rewrite. So that's my plan. Starting today, I'm just going to hack through this awful chapter.

I have no idea why I find it so hard to write Marilla. I understand her completely. I know everything about her from her motivations to her future. Perhaps Marilla is too similar to me, perhaps that is what makes her hard to write. Strange that I can find a psychopath male's voice but not one that is similar to my own.

Anyone out there have advice for what you do when you're blocked? Or when you're really struggling with a character?

Controversy

Yesterday's post mentioned on of the recent YA controversies; however, it is far from the only controversy in the field of Young Adult Literature. It seems almost every other week people are arguing about something: Boy Books, the B***** List, Feminism, Violence, Sex, and sooo much more. It seems you can't mention a popular YA book without some controversy popping up.

Why? Why is YA so ridiculously controversial? MG rarely has this problem, with the exception of some misled people thinking Harry Potter is of the devil. Adult books have controversy but the controversy is never about whether its ok for adult books to discuss topics or whether something is appropriate or too much. So why is the controversy all in YA?

Well I think the real answer to this is that MG is determinedly PG or low PG-13. Adult books have free range to be anything from G to NC-17. But YA books....oh YA books. Some are cleanly G. Some are NC-17. Most I would argue are safely PG-13. And they are aimed at teenagers, which is a group of people as widely diverse as any can be.

We want to keep our kids safe. We want to teach them good things. But kids don't always live in a safe world. They don't always do good things. Where is the line in portraying the world as it is and portraying the lessons and world views we want teens to have? Where is the line in wanting to keep our kids safe and wanting to censor them?

My parents never limited what I read. My parents really had no idea what I was reading, not because they were bad parents, but because they couldn't. I just read too much. But on the other hand, I didn't read YA books (by choice) as a teen. I solidly and steadily read adult books--most of which were safely PG-13. But my little sister read A LOT of YA books as a teen, and I tried my best to read them all--to keep up with what she was reading, and I have to say I was stunned by the messages I felt YA was giving, messages that I didn't feel were in adult books--messages that I felt were detrimental and hurtful to a female teenager's mind.

I would try to talk to my sister about these books--try to give her better books to read, better YA books with awesome messages, but she didn't want anything to do with a book I recommended to her--she still doesn't.

And therein lies the crux of all YA controversies.

We're trying to protect people who don't want to be protected.

And so YA is always going to have controversy. Parents are always going to try to shelter their kids. Teens are always going to push back on those protections.

Anyway, I mention all this because in the coming weeks I might do a few posts on some of the controversies out there and my often strange feelings about them. I've mentioned this before but I was a really strange, logical, rational teenager. This often causes me to have really strange opinions on things because when I look back at the olden days when I was in teen at the turn of the century (that's right I get to say that), I remember how coolly logical my thoughts were. But I recognize now that most females under twenty aren't like that (at the time it frankly baffled me).

So I hope you don't mind as in the next few weeks we explore the random opinions of this crazy writer. And if you have any controversies you would like my two cents on please leave them in the comments. Though lets please keep them at least loosely related to books.

Fear & Book Reviews

Despite the fact that I've been Internet connected since I was fifteen years old, I'm actually fairly new to the whole author(aspiring or published)/agent/publishing online community. Seriously, before I started reading Stuff Christians Like, I didn't read blogs. Never had any interest in them. And I really didn't know anything about the publishing industry at all. I discovered SCL and started doing research my third year in college, which is the year I also started blogging, just for fun and mainly just for my friends.

Generally, the more I know the more I realize I don't know anything (thank you Socrates), but as I read writerly blogs, I discover something else. The more I know the more terrified I become.

Mainly in the context of book reviews.

For almost two full years, I have been blogging book reviews. Sure they haven't always been regular, but I started this blog with the intent that I would review every book I read, in a short concise way. Why? Mainly because I firmly believe books should be rated and wanted to put ratings out there for other people. But also because I read more than any of my other friends, and a lot of them do come to me for recommendations. So I figured why not put them all in one easy to access place?

My reviews are generally positive. They're not always enthusiastic for every book, but I firmly believe that every published book has merit--or else it wouldn't be published. This book is some writers baby, and I respect that.

But I sometimes post bad reviews. Sometimes I'm frankly not just unimpressed but horrified by what I read. However, in all of my time of blogging, I can only remember posting one really awful probably slightly mean review. From what I hear, I don't really think Mr. Goodkind cares about my opinion anyway. However, I recently read one book that frankly horrified me, and though I don't think the review I prepared is mean, its definitely negative.

And I'm now afraid to post it.

Why? Well for the past couple of months I've begun to realize that there is a not so subtle message coming from people in the publishing world (be they agents or authors). Only publish good reviews. Never publish a negative review if you want to be an aspiring author. Only publish reviews of books you truly love.

As I say, this really hasn't been a problem for me. I mean look at my reviews from last week. They were like love letters to Cassandra Clare. But I had planned to post this bad review today, and I double checked it to make sure it was critical and not snarky and figured that would be enough. After all, this is a little known blog, its semi-anonymous, and its really just for my friends. I don't want them to accidentally pick up this awful book and then ask me why I didn't warn them.

Then something crazy exploded in the blogosphere. Truly insane, really. The discussion has been labeled as YA Mafia, and for a good recap, go here to YA Highway.

Basically the underlying message of the discussion was: don't post negative reviews or it may come back to really bite you.

So now my heart is filled with fear. I've never really considered myself a YA writer, but my current WIP is YA. And I totally get networking and not wanting to burn bridges; however, I am also really outspoken about my beliefs.

Let's put it this way. If I ever met Terry Goodkind, I would be unfailingly polite and I would honestly tell him everything I loved about his books. (Like every straight female whose read Sword of Truth, I can't help but like Richard Rahl). However, if asked I wouldn't lie to him about what I didn't like: the plot. His characterization and ability to make you love a character is stunning. But I found the plot very lacking.

I'm not looking for conflict, so if I met the author of the bad review I want to post, I would never without prompting tirade against them and their books. In fact, I'm afraid of conflict. But if it came up in conversation, if they asked me, I would not lie to them. And isn't the point of reviewing saying what you liked and didn't like about a book?

So basically, I have no idea what to do about this book review. I wrote it. I planned to publish it here today. But what if, one day, that author sees I wrote a bad review and then decides to shot block me somehow? Because despite the YA community's reassurances that there is no mafia, everyone still cautioned that if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all, because it may actually hurt you.

What do you guys think? If you're one of my friends who reads this blog because you know me personally, what are your feelings on me posting negative reviews? If you don't know me in "real life" but follow this blog--what's your opinion on negative reviews? Have you been following the YA Mafia insanity? What are your feelings on it?

And I guess the underlying question is: should I post the negative review?

Critiques and Descent

If you're a writer and you don't frequent the blog Miss Snark's First Victim, you don't know what you're missing. It's a great blog for aspiring and established writers to get critiques and see how agents view those crucial first 250 words of your novel.

This week, Authoress--the hostess--is doing a critique called "Drop the Needle" where writers could enter any 250 words from their story as long as it goes along with the theme she presets. This week's theme is revelations.

So why am I telling you all this? Well, for the first time, I was brave enough to try to enter one of her critiques and I got in! Woohoo! And I didn't just send in 250 words from any old story. I sent in 250 words from Descent, the novel whose inspiration I discussed in an earlier post today.

So if you're a friend and want a taste of the new Descent, go check it out my entry. If you're a writer, head over to Miss Snark's First Vicitm and join in the critiquing.

On a slight different note, if you're one of my non-writer friends, please don't offer a critique or comment unless you feel you're opinion is really valid. I don't want a rush of friends on my post saying "I love Mandy! I love everything she writes! Woohoo!". Serious critiques people. That's what Miss Snark's First Victim is about. Serious, helpful, but not snarky, critiques.

When Inspiration Hits

One of my current WIPs (WIP = work in progress) is something that is near and dear to my heart. I thought of the original idea that eventually grew into this story when I was a sophomore in high school. In many ways it was a reaction to Harry Potter, so yes, it involves wizards, but now it has gained a life of its own, and is a story that I think is worth telling and needs to be told.

So if this idea has been around so long, why haven't I written it? I've tried several times. I've started it so many ways. But every time I'll write three chapters and then falter. I can't go on. I'm no longer hearing it, feeling it. Somehow, what I'm writing is not true to the vision I feel in my heart.

Recently I've really struggled with it. I'd written six chapters, but I reached a wall. Not a wall of writer's block, I knew what should come next in this draft and know how to write it. No, this wall was a feeling that the story was failing, not staying true to what it should be.

In many ways this is the darkest story I've ever tried to write. It's a story of evil and its development, of how it slowly takes over. But my draft wasn't giving that feeling, that ambiance. It seemed too lighthearted, not enough darkness.

I thought of combining it with another WIP, trying to force them to come together to get that feel. But the characters wouldn't agree, they wouldn't mesh. It felt forced on every level.

So the story went on the back burner. I turned to another one while letting the juices of that story stew.

Then in class on Thursday, inspiration struck. I really can't describe it any other way.

I remembered the first line of one of my early drafts. I remembered the emotions I was trying to convey. And suddenly it was like I was hearing a voice speaking to me in my head. It was Chris, my main character, telling me his story.

I began writing in class, disregarding the lecture on statistics. I raced home, sat at my computer, and wrote for 4 hours. At the end of it, I had nearly 10,000 words. Ten thousand words that for the first time seem to get how this story is supposed to be.

Is it perfect? No. It'll all need revision of course, once I finish the story. But I think I've captured the voice, the mood, the feeling of darkness.

For the first time, I am confident that this start is one I can take to the finish with confidence. All I want to do is write in it.

This time Chris's story will be told and I'm thrilled.

Conflict

We've discussed a lot of the story idea process, but the one element we haven't discussed yet is conflict. There is a good reason for that. Conflict and good plot are the main things I struggle with. I can create worlds that are rife with conflict--worlds where pickpockets are dominated by mobsters then taken off the street by a man feared by mobsters and regular people alike--but somehow I can't make that conflict jump off the page. Why? How? It's something I'm working on.

Without conflict, there is no story. In some stories, the conflict is obvious. Look at The Hunger Games. A girl's little sister is chosen for a reality show where teenagers fight to the death, so said girl volunteers in her sisters place. She then spends the majority of the novel trying to stay alive. In A Wrinkle in Time, Meg must save her father. In the Lord of the Rings, Frodo must destroy the One Ring. In Harry Potter, a boy must take down the Dark Lord. What would any of these books been without the conflict?

Katniss hunts in the woods.
Meg sulks in the back of a classroom.
Frodo eats six meals a day.
Harry lives under a cupboard.

Exciting, right?

And yet, when writing, I really love exploring some mundane aspects of life. But mostly I love character development, how a character slowly grows and changes. And sometimes, I forget the plot and instead Arthur spends 100,000 words in Copperton getting to know the family he never knew he had. (That's right, Meredith--an Alloquor reference.) To me, its riveting to see how Arthur deals with the fact that he has an extended family, it helps with his healing process over his brother's death...but there is no plot.

It's said that in a novel every sentence should be character development or plot development. Unfortunately, my novels tend to be 75% character development and 25% plot development.

So I really have no helpful hints or pointers on developing plot. My plots get better with each revision of the novel. I'm slowly making my novel more plot heavy (which is especially important in MG).

If any of my readers have tips on how to think of great conflict/plot the first time around though, I would greatly appreciate it. How do you spice up the action of your story?

Secondary Characters

Other than background "extras" like a shopkeeper who is only visited once, secondary characters are our third type of character. They can be the minions of our main character or antagonist. They can be a friendly neighbor. They can be a supportive best friend. Basically, they're the character who would be looking to get "best supporting actor/actress" if this was a movie.

Spirit Riddled has several that I can think of off the top of my head. All are created because the main character or antagonist needs this person to exist, either to further the plot or to be the character they are. For example, if your main character is a second son who is not to inherit the throne, then there needs to be a firstborn. This firstborn may not be directly tied to the conflict in anyway--he may not even show up in the story directly. But his existence directly correlates to how the second son thinks and behaves. An example of someone who furthers the plot might be the assassin your villain hires to kill off your main character. He exists so that there is an assassination attempt on your main character, allowing him to realize someone has it in for him--thus furthering the conflict.

So these characters are created to compliment the other characters (though by compliment I don't always mean to make look better. Sometimes they make the main character worse). In a past post, I mentioned how its important to me, as a writer, to know the future of a main character--to know whether they marry and if they do who it is. And I asked for your help to create this person. So Mage's wife. Who is she? How did I create her? Did you guys help? Yep. Your comments definitely helped.

So, I was having an extremely hard time thinking of this character--how she would compliment Mage, how she would challenge him, make him grow as a character, and yet be the wife he needed. I was really stumped, and all the comments helped. Some of the comments made me think "No, Mage would never go for that" or "No, that sort of person who never help Mage to be who he needs to be". But some made me think "Yes, Mage needs that!" or "that could help him". However, one comment in particular struck me. My friend, Michael Gabriel said that she and Mage needed to have a "mutual concern for children".

My immediate thought was "yes, of course!" Mage could never be with someone who didn't care for abandoned and lonely children like he did. He would resent her, she would be in direct conflict with one of his life goals. This thought gave me the foundation I needed to create a character who loves lost children more than anything--perhaps even more than Mage.

So for those of you who helped and are curious, here is a small blurb about the woman who will be Mage's wife. A secondary character that was only recently created.

Name: Bridgette Tailor
Occupation: tailor, teacher

History: Bridgette is the middle class daughter of two tailors, and that is what she believes she will one day be. However, she has a kind of heart and is always caring for sick neighbors. She particularly loves children and wants to help the abandoned children of her nation, but doesn't know how. Her parents worry for her safety and don't want her going into the bad parts of their city. And then one day she comes into contact with an abandoned boy.

Attributes: Kind. Bridgette's main characteristic is that she's a bleeding heart. She will help anyone if they need it, even if they are thieves or "demon-possessed". Self-Conscious. Bridgette doesn't really think much of herself. Most people mistake her self-demeaning personality as modesty, but its not. She really just doesn't think she's worth most people's time--which is one of the reason why she is so selfless and throws herself into helping other people so much. Hard-working. Bridgette believes in working hard to get where you want. Though she's willing to teach and help anyone, she believes in teaching a man to fish, so he can feed himself forever. Ardent. When Bridgette believes in something or someone, its with her entire being. She will do everything she can for that cause or person. Reasonable. Despite her ardent nature, Bridgette never loses her ability to be reasoned with. She doesn't blindly believe anything.

Thank you everyone who helped! I'm excited to see how the secondary character of Bridgette will affect Jess and Mage and help them to become better people.

Antagonists

Technically main characters are "protagonists" and opposing characters/bad guys are "antagonists". However, outside of my AP Lit class I've rarely called a main character a "protagonist" but "antagonist" is a word I can't help using. Why? Because not all opposing characters are actually bad. They're not all villains. But this is common knowledge, I'm sure, so I won't cite literary examples or anything. I'm sure you can all think of antagonists who weren't actually bad.

I'm a huge fan of bad guys who aren't pure evil--who have good sides. Mainly this is because unless your bad guys is the devil, Sauron, or some equivalent, he probably wasn't born evil. At some point in his life, he was probably a decent fellow--if not good--and he made some bad choices, like Saruman the White Wizard in LOTR. And then there are antagonists who aren't bad at all--they just stand in the main character's way.

Spirit Riddled has two kinds of antagonists. Those who are genuinely bad (but weren't born that way) and one who is actually good but just stands in Jess's way. How did I think of these antagonists? Well, it's all about creating conflict--something we still have a need to discuss. In the world of Spirit Riddled our three (that's right, three) antagonists came directly from the world building. We have the High Priest--who staunchly believes that all people with magic are demon-possessed. We have the Godfather like ruler of the thieves--who seeks to take out his revenge on Mage. And we have the ruler of the nation--who simply fears that Mage might overthrow him with all of his "magical" power. Basically, all my antagonists run on fear of these magical people.

Spirit Riddled is very much a story about fear in that way.

To create a good antagonist, you need someone who is going to oppose your main character, someone whose intentional and unintentional actions create road blocks.

Generally, my antagonists come in two sorts: products of the world and products of the main character. The products of the world are rulers, priests, lords--people who come form the world building, who would exist regardless of whether the main character existed. The products of the main character are people who are directly connected to the main character and who are unimportant otherwise: an abusive father, a jealous brother, a former best friend, a neighbor.

It's hard to talk about antagonists without talking about conflict, but fear not. Soon we will. And conflict is what drives the story.

Main Characters

In recent posting we've been discussing the beginning evolution of a story, or how a story springs into mind and develops. We've talked about the chaotic inception that happens in my mind, we've talked about the needed formula, and we've talked about world building. That leaves two other aspects of our formula: characters and conflict. Furthermore, I feel its important to divide characters up into three more categories: main characters, villains, and secondary characters. In this post, we'll focus on main characters.

Most of the time, a main character is the first thing I think of after the initial Question. Sometimes its just an image of the main character doing something. Sometimes its a comment that the main character will make. And sometimes its an action. With Spirit Riddled and Jess it was definitely an action. But the funny thing was Jess wasn't inspired by an action that actually happens in Spirit Riddled. The first thing I imagined the character that would be Jess doing actually takes place much later, in a sequel.

I created the story of Spirit Riddled during one of the most interesting summers of my life. I was in Toulouse, France living with a French family. Every day was an adventure. Around every corner was something exciting and inspiring. But Jess wasn't inspired by my magical surroundings. She was inspired by my older sister, back home, who decided she was going to contact her biological father.

Now a bit of backstory. I have three siblings; I am Three of Four*. My older siblings have a different biological father from me, but two years before I was born, my dad adopted them. I didn't know any of this until I was in eighth grade. Up to that point, I thought we all had the same parents. When I learned about it, it didn't change anything for me. But when I was a senior in high school my brother decided he wanted to contact this man who voluntarily gave him up. Two years later, my older sister did the same.

I was mad. Really really really mad, when my older sister did this. She had spent the past two years saying my brother was stupid, that he was breaking up our family, and then she went in did the same. I didn't understand. I still don't understand. All I could think was why would you want to find a man who gave you up? I was born to my father, and that's awesome. He loves me, and I love him. But my siblings? My father CHOSE them. He didn't have to have them. He didn't have to love him. There was no biological imperative and he loves them anyway. They've treated him like crap in the past couple of years, and he loves them anyway unconditionally. And he chose it. How beautiful is that? How awesome is that? And wouldn't it be nice for once if someone was actually freaking grateful for that?

And thus was born Jess. I pictured this action, this choice she would have at some point. At some point the man who took her in (Mage, who we've discussed before) is going to ask "I chose you. Can't that be enough?" And instead of crying that no it isn't enough, or instead of running back to the man who abandoned her Jess is simply going to say "Yes."

Aha! Did you catch that? Jess wasn't just invented there. So was Mage. The two were invented together. Weird. It sometimes just happens like that. But Jess and Mage are an inseparable duo in my mind and in the story (well...until Jess grows up and marries---never mind. No spoilers. :)

Anyway, when Jess was created, Mage was created simultaneously, and the two were created to compliment and strengthen each other. And in turn their creation helped create their world, since Jess and Mage are the two "demon-possessed" we are following. The villains (or really antagonists) were created in reaction to Jess and Mage to create conflict, and the villains definitely shape the world as we will see in the next post

*Yes, that is my Borg designation. Yes, my mind really does think like that. And yes, my mom is a Trekkie so its kind of appropriate.

World Building

Yes, finally, the long awaited post on World Building. I hope you aren't highly anticipating it, because I'm not sure it can live up to that sort of expectation.

So World Building...what is it? It's basically creating your setting. In the fantasy genre, this is literally building a new world. However, even literary and contemporary stories have a setting. The setting includes things like the local school, nearby stores, businesses, etc. However, I mainly write fantasy, so we'll focus on the fantasy genre world building.

So using the example of Spirit Riddled, how did I create the world? Well the world was hidden in the question: "What if people with magic were viewed as demon possessed, sort of like the Salem Witch Trials, rather than seen as a higher class in society?" The core of the society is in that question: a society that views people with magic as demon possessed. This brings up several other aspects of the world. In order to have demons, the world must have some sort of religion. So now we need a religion and a clergy that push this belief that magic is evil. So what happens to these demon possessed people? Do we just decapitate them immediately? Hmm...well that would not be much of a story (see we're thinking about Conflict and Plot here as we world build), so we need a religion that does not want you to directly kill these evil demons (unlike the Salem Witch Trials). But they still need some sort of trial. Some way to purify them....like abandoning them and leaving them to their Creator's will. So where do these abandoned go? Well now we need to create some sort of undersociety, thieves, murderers, criminals. Where we have criminals we need people to fight them--like a guard or police. To have a guard or police we need a government.

See how this works? Think about one aspect of society leads to another. Everything is related to create a society where people with magic are evil.

The question doesn't always lead to a world, as is the case with my new story about Joshua. However, sometimes I just get a really good idea for a world. In this case, in the back of my mind had been sitting a world without any characters, without any plot. A world Joshua became perfect for.

I don't want to give away the details of the world, but there are a couple of points to be kept in mind when creating a fantasy world.

1. You don't want it to be cliche. Most fantasy worlds take place in a medieval environment. Change it up a bit. Think about other time periods.
2. Technology, technology, technology. Make sure its consistent. You can change the way technology develops--allowing certain things to develop before others. But you need to think about it. You don't need to be a technology expert, but just remember: you don't get interchangeable parts from blacksmiths.
3. Location. How do you make your fantasy world not cliche? Maybe you shouldn't place it in the equivalent of England. Where do you live? Maybe your fantasy world should take place in the fantasy equivalent of Colorado. For a unique fantasy environment, I recommend Brent Week's Night Angel Trilogy. It's certainly not in England anymore.
4. Clothing. Seriously. Clothing should not be overlooked. This can help make your world unique. Maybe it does take place in England, but in an England with an Indian culture. So you're people are wearing saris or dhoti.
5. Government. There are many types of government in the world, and you're not even limited to what actually works in our world. Take two governments and mush them together. Be creative. Look at ancient governments like Republican Rome, Greece, Carthage, China, Egypt, and even Biblical governments.
   
6. Religion. You can't really ignore it. All societies on Earth created some sort of religion. It doesn't have to be central to your story, but religion affects the way your characters think and behave. Even if your characters don't believe the religion, the fact they live in a society with that religion in it, will affect them. Fantasy writers can't really get away with ignoring religion. If you want to ignore it, write SF.
7. Culture. How do men treat women? Are they equal? Different? Does your society have distinct classes? Or is everyone equal? How do they treat their elders? Their children? This can and will tie into both religion and government. Everything is connected and that's the way it should be.

Really this is all to say you should just think about your setting, your world, your society.

Take the time. Make a story bible. Think about it. And make your world unique.

Inception (Not the Movie)

So I just thought of a new idea for a novel at the beginning of this week, and I thought this would be a good chance to take my readers through the process of creation that happens in my mind. For those of you who are writers, it'll just be a curious glimpse into another writer's process. For those of you who aren't writers, it will help you to understand the chaos of my mind.

In my novel Spirit Riddled, which I will very soon be furiously revising, a girl is taken off the streets by a mysterious man who most of the world thinks is evil--but he's not. At the beginning, the main character doesn't know if the mysterious man is evil or not. One of my critiquers commented "I really hope [mysterious man] is evil and in the end [main character] has to kill him."

My response was "No. No. No. No. No. Never in a million years would that happen in Spirit Riddled. That's a completely different story." And then I never thought about that comment again until this week.

Sometimes my mind does curious things. I was sitting in my lab, messing with the star tracker, when the comment popped back in my mind. And you know what, it is a different story. A kid gets taken in by someone he thinks is good but who turns out to be bad. Sure, a stereotypical twist maybe, but its just the beginning of an idea. Its the initial thought that can spring into a 50,000 word novel.

I immediately assumed this story would be Middle Grade, like Spirit Riddled, though I had recently been working on a lot of adult stuff. I really do enjoy writing Middle Grade and I really wanted to write this story from a boy's perspective. I suppose I could have done YA and made my MC (main character) 15 years old, but every YA I've started to write has given me tons of trouble. YA just has themes and issues that I don't really like to deal with. Middle grade, however, is perfect. Then my themes can be family and familial betrayal, something I know a surprisingly lot about.

As soon as I decided the MC would be a boy, the name Joshua almost immediately popped into my head. I think it was because V started up again, and Joshua is the name of the doctor alien who was part of the 5th column. I really like the name Joshua, but its one I haven't used before, and I refuse, as a matter of rule, to reuse names I've used in past stories. Once a name is associated with a character, its retired.

I needed Joshua to be dumped by his parents somehow early on, in order for him to be taken in (both literally and figuratively) by someone new. But I didn't want to have him actually abandoned, since that's Spirit Riddled's thing. My next thought was dead parents--dying in some sort of tragic accident. And instead of a stranger taking him in it would be his estranged uncle. And to add to Joshua's internal conflict, I decided his mother would have died long ago, leaving him with a father who is still mourning her death. His father wastes away their money trying to forget the mom, and the family is in poverty. Poverty is really all Joshua has ever known. When Uncle comes for him, Uncle is rich.

Hmmm....too like Spirit Riddled. Uncle isn't just rich. Uncle is part of an elite ruling class of their society. In a society that has a chasm-like split. There is the rich wealthy fabulous ruling class, and the impoverished everyone else. Two classes in one nation, and the two classes have completely different cultures and ways of life. So it's not just that Joshua goes from poor to rich. He goes from one culture and society to another. Suddenly, I'm world building.

And world building is a post for another day.

A Treacherous Walk

I drive my car the entire 1.6 miles to work every day for a very good reason. Living in the border between midtown and downtown Atlanta isn't exactly safe. However, recently, the an apocalypse of snow and ice has hit Atlanta. Georgia Tech has been closed for two days. TWO DAYS.

In all my 5.5 years at Georgia Tech it has never closed. Not for tornado warnings, snow, ice, or anything. But we have gotten 4 to 5 inches of snow covered in a nice thick layer of ice. Georgia Tech is closed.

However, if you read last Thursday's post, you know that my research team is crazily trying to finish building a satellite which means shortly after I learned Georgia Tech was closed on Monday I got an email from my project manager that said, "You WILL be coming in to work tomorrow."

Of course. Let me just drive my little car up the icy, hilly streets and...yeah that's not going to happen.

So instead I pulled out my boots, my scarf, my hat, my long john's, my turtleneck, my sweater, and my jackets and bundled up like that kid in a Christmas story. I then walked the entire 1.6 miles in the snow with no problems.

That was yesterday. Today was a little different because you see while yesterday I walked to work in snow, today I walked to work in ice.

There were literally parts of my walk where I was sliding down the sidewalk, praying that I wouldn't fall and break something, and using a nearby building to balance.

I watched a car spin out and nearly take out a few other pedestrians.

I was then walking by a church when I heard a strange sound. I looked around in alarm, fearing that a car was careening towards me when suddenly I was being pelted by icy, hard snow. Snow was falling off the roof of the church and on to me.

Once I finally got to the AE building, I couldn't actually get to the first door I tried to access, because the door is on a slight incline that was covered in ice.

Man, I hate the snow.

But it did give me a lot of perspective and great ideas for a new story I'm writing. (I know, I know, I'm always writing a new story. Doesn't help my New Years Goals). Snow isn't something I have a lot of experience in. Atlanta, GA is the furthest north I've ever lived. My life was spent everywhere from Hawaii to Florida, but no where that has snow regularly. And my new world I've created is a cold one. It can't help it. That's just the way the orbital mechanics of the world is.

I now know what it feels like to have snow crunch under my feet (walking in thick snow is kind of like walking in sand, which I have a lot of experience with). I now know the dangers of snow falling off roofs. I now know how terrifying having no control on your footing because of ice can be.

Yes, lots of good ideas came from my rather treacherous walk this morning. Hopefully I'll get even more ideas on my way back...and less bruises.

New Year's Goals

It's the beginning of a new year, and with that new year comes new hopes and dreams. At the beginning of each new year I see this vast blank page, waiting for me to fill it, waiting to to fulfill all my hopes and dreams.

I don't usually make New Year's Resolutions, but I always envision the incredible things I might do in the New Year. So this year, I am making New Year's Goals.

Since my life is divided in three main ways (Christian, writer, and engineer), I'm making those goals in those three categories.

And this year my friends is going to be a BIG year. Why you ask? Well, you'll have to read my goals to find out.

Engineer Goals:
1) Graduate in December 2011.
Wow. Graduation. Again. But this time, for realz. This time, I'll walk that graduation stage in a hooded robe to get my Master's Degree and there will be no going back. No going back to school that is. With that degree I'm going to be done, and I CAN'T WAIT!

2) Get a job at JPL.
That's a big one. A life goal actually. But since this is the year I graduate, this is the year to realize this goal. Fingers crossed my friends! Hopefully this time next year, I'll be looking for an apartment in Pasadena, CA.

3) Complete my design of R3's ADCS.
This one is sort of necessary to make either 1 or 2 happen. I can't graduate without completing it, because this is sort of my master's thesis. I can't get a job unless I graduate. And designing a complete ADCS system from scratch is a great way to get the attention of JPL.

Writer Goals:
1) Make the FINAL revision* on Spirit Riddled.
I don't know if my final revision will be the next revision or two more after that, but I want to get this story done this year. I've been working on Spirit Riddled for ages (school really slows down the writing process), and I'm ready to be done.

2) Start querying Spirit Riddled.
Yes, with final revision done I can finally query! For the non-writers who read this blog, that means I will start sending out a letter describing my book to agents in hopes that they will represent me. Woo! Perhaps this goal would be better if I said "I will get an agent for Spirit Riddled", but I've never seriously queried a book before** so querying is a big step for me.

3) Finish a first draft of ANY other book.
I believe I've expressed before that I have writer ADD. I have a hard time focusing on one story. School also sort of sucks all the time out of my life. Most of my stories make it to about 10 chapters in until something else takes over my life. Namely school. So I would like to have another first draft done, so once Spirit Riddled is done done I can start another set of revisions.

4) Not be a slacker critiquer.
If I've ever agreed to critique something for you in the past year, I apologize. I'm going to once again through school under the bus, but its the only real excuse I have. This year, I'm actually going to respond to the people I'm critiquing for in a timely fashion. Woohoo!

Christian/Personal Goals:
1) Be a nicer person.
So 1/3 of my family thinks I'm like a really mean person. (1/3 being two people, so more than you might initially think). I'm going to work on that one. I don't mean to be mean (is that a pun? it's not intended). I don't think my friends think I'm mean, so maybe its just that I'm too harsh on my family. Maybe I expect too much of them? So this may actually come down to me not caring as much. (That's my little sister's advice). We'll see how this goes.

2) Actually have a regular quiet time.
Once again, I blame school for this not occurring. But by golly, I'm not going to continue allowing school to take over my life. I'm going to schedule regular quite times and its going to happen!

So that's my New Year's Goals. Any else out there have goals? Any thoughts on mine?

Happy New Year!

*By final revision, I mean my final authorial revision outside of the revisions my agents and editors will probably ask me to do. Most agents and editors do have suggestions and want changes. I'm cool with that.
**This is not to say that Spirit Riddled is the first book I've ever tried to write. I've always been a really harsh judge of my own writing and I've shelved numerous stories for various reasons. This will be the first time a story has made it this far in my personal judgment court.

A Critique

So as some of my readers know, at Dragon*Con I got into a Master's Writing Workshop. Only seven students were accepted. And finally, yesterday, I got my one-on-one critique. So I thought I would share the feedback I got with all of you and my thoughts on it.

First she told me what I was doing right:

• Nice voice
• Likable protagonist
  
• Not a cookie cutter medieval world
• The idea of magic being viewed by the general populace as evil is different from most fantasy books and therefore interesting
• Jess is a character readers will identify with
• It has an easy flow
• Good style
• Good descriptions

All and all, I'm very glad those things were right. I know voice and style are the two things that are hard to create in a writer. Plot (my major problem in this story) can always be fixed, but the only real way to fix style and voice is by lots of reading. Thank goodness I already have the lots of reading required to develop those things under my belt.

So I knew going in that there were a lot of problems with pacing and lack of plot in the middle of the story, and of course the critiquer realized this too. Awesomely she helped me think of a lot of really great ideas including:

• creating another POV (for those of you who have read Spirit Riddled this 2nd POV would be Berta). This would allow me to show some of the events that Jess (my MC) can't experience first hand (Bank Tower explosion) and allow this character to pay a greater role in the story, which is cool. And since she's only a 15/16ish year old girl she's not too old to participate as a secondary POV in a MG book.
• changing one character entirely to make her bad (Basically I'm taking Antonina out and replacing her with a different maid). This opened a lot of possibilities, which includes having someone in the story who is constantly (and visibly) working against Jess and trying to keep her in her old mind set.

We basically spent the entire time talking about how to jazz up the plot in the middle and a few things she thought of as "logic problems" (meaning they didn't make sense to her). Usually, most of the logic problems weren't because I hadn't though it out but because I hadn't explained it adequately. One good example of that is one of the main plot points in the story is that a building blows up. Because of this, my critiquer assumed that my society had basic guns (like muskets). So she felt there were a lot of inconsistencies and logic problems with the time era my society is in. However, I explained to her that my society is more like ancient China, that had rockets and explosives but not guns. That made sense to her once I explained it BUT I'm not going to be there to explain those things to my readers. So now I have an idea for adding a scene in earlier that explains this about the society (in a show not tell sort of way).

Basically the critique was really good because it gave me great ideas about how to fix this story in the middle while still being true to the story. I wasn't afraid to reject the ideas my critiquer brought up that weren't true to the story. There was one in particular that would be a good story but wasn't MY story.

I think that's important to remember whenever a writer gets any critique. I could easily have taken that first idea I was given and made a good story. However, when I explained that wasn't my story, the critiquer and I were able to think of any better ideas--ideas that were true to my story.

So that's the basics of the critique I got. And hopefully, one day when research and school aren't crazy, I'll actually be able to revise it.